Superficial relationships in the church are a tragedy. The church is
the last place humanity should be allowed to anonymously pass by each
other. As Christians we live in the eyes-wide-open panorama of the cross of Christ (1 Cor. 1:18). No longer stumbling about in the pervasive darkness blind to the sin that plagues our existence. We now walk in the light (Eph. 5:7-8). We see each other clearly with all our common ailments.
From our common confession springs sympathy and compassion. Rather than
reject each other, we
welcome each other into a common life of
brokenness, grace, forgiveness and transformation. No one passes by
unknown or unaccepted. There is no longer a need to hide our brokenness.
There is nothing left for us to hide (for all is known) and no reason
to hide it (for all is forgiven). There is no need to put on our “Sunday
best.” We are free to confess our weakness one to another without fear
of condemnation (Psa. 34:17-18). Or, are we?
Despite the fact that we place a premium on “authentic relationships,”
very few people within the church ever come to enjoy them. We make great
boasts of “the way and the truth and the life”, but gather us together
into our churches and all this truth speech goes silent. We clam up
about the interior of our own souls and personal struggles. We hide from
one another. What you tend to hear in church instead of soul-exposing
honesty is cliché driven dialogue adorned with spiritual speak. “Fine,”
we say to one another, “I’m doing fine.” We accept these sorts of
answers from one another and move on to sports, kids or weekly routines.
But, we are not “fine” and we know it. We are all fallen people (Rom. 3:23). All our silence is needless and destructive (Psa. 32:3-5).
We need to be known.
For as long as we have been “in church” how many of us are truly known
by other people? How well do we know those around us? Furthermore, how
many of us truly know ourselves. There is a self-awareness and
perspective on life that can only come from mutual fellowship saturated
in the truth of God’s Word (Eph. 4:25).
True Christian fellowship is born of truth and freedom and grace. The truth about who we truly are before a Holy God. The freedom to confess our brokenness in view of God’s unconditional love through Christ. The grace to receive each other’s broken lives without condemnation. This type of love is equal parts intrusion and gentleness (Phil. 1:9). The fruit of such love is an accountability which, rather than producing fear, produces freedom (1 Jn. 4:18).
Are you truly known by your brothers and sisters in Christ?
Here are a few positive signs that you’re experiencing true fellowship as a Christian:
· Sunday services are the smallest part of your participation
in the church. The greater exposure to the Body of Christ happens
outside of Sunday morning’s service throughout the week.
· Multiple members of your church would be the first people on
the scene if you should experience a great need or personal tragedy.